Welcome to Adoption-Matters.com
About this Blog
This blog is for anyone interested in adoption issues, including adopted children, birth parents, adoptive parents, relatives, and friends on both sides.
At the outset, please understand that this Blog is not a professional site but rather a gathering place for people to read, learn, peruse, even air some issues they have regarding adoption. Should you require professional literature or professional services, or if you want to read personal memoirs on adoption, be assured that an abundance of information is at your disposal. Just Google the word [adoption] or take a look on Amazon.com and you'll see what I mean. Should you be looking for adoption agencies, legalities, support, etc., or if you are considering giving a child up for adoption, you may be helped by viewing the comprehensive Child Welfare Information Gateway website for access to professional services you need. Go to http://www.childwelfare.gov/
There's no denying that we feel natural when our biological heritage is known. We think about it out of interest but not out of longing. Heritage matters to people who grow up never seeing the faces of their biological relatives. Adoption maters to them, and it also matters to those of us who live inside the adoption triad - birth mother, child given up and adoptive parents.
I am an adoptive mother who cannot imagine life without my beloved children who are biologically related to someone else. When I began the research for my novel, DEBUT, I was only mildly surprised to learn that perhaps a third of United States population is in some way related to a child given up for adoption. But, you can easily calculate the math to see why this figure looms large, for it includes all biological relations from the birth family; the adoptive family of parents, siblings, grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins. And this figure doesn't include friends.
The art of fiction is a perfect medium for portraying the wide spectrum of the adoption triad. DEBUT includes a range of issues that reveal the significance of heritage. The characters hold secrets that are too painful to share even with those they love and so they live on with a broken link to their heritage. Accepting the reality of their lives is a difficult journey because it is traveled alone.
DEBUT speaks for the birth mother who lives with regret and guilt while trying to build a new life; the adopted child who yearns for wholeness while harboring resentment and confusing thoughts, even wondering whose pain is worse - hers or her birth mother's; the adoptive parents who fear their beloved child may one day open the door to the past.
These characters have secrets other people do not have. The birth mother starts building a secret life from the moment she regrets giving up her child and feels grief and guilt. As time goes on, she fears that the child might even reject her for the decision she made and, as a result, cannot face searching for her.
The adoptive parents start building a secret life when they wonder in fear if the birth mother might someday show up at their door. Later on they fear that their child might open the door to the past and upset the balance of their lives.
The adopted child builds a secret life in adolescence, when her inherited vocal gift causes her to wonder about her heritage. Time goes on. What she wants to know most of all is whether her birth mother even once wanted her back.
Please share your comments.
This blog is for anyone interested in adoption issues, including adopted children, birth parents, adoptive parents, relatives, and friends on both sides.
At the outset, please understand that this Blog is not a professional site but rather a gathering place for people to read, learn, peruse, even air some issues they have regarding adoption. Should you require professional literature or professional services, or if you want to read personal memoirs on adoption, be assured that an abundance of information is at your disposal. Just Google the word [adoption] or take a look on Amazon.com and you'll see what I mean. Should you be looking for adoption agencies, legalities, support, etc., or if you are considering giving a child up for adoption, you may be helped by viewing the comprehensive Child Welfare Information Gateway website for access to professional services you need. Go to http://www.childwelfare.gov/
There's no denying that we feel natural when our biological heritage is known. We think about it out of interest but not out of longing. Heritage matters to people who grow up never seeing the faces of their biological relatives. Adoption maters to them, and it also matters to those of us who live inside the adoption triad - birth mother, child given up and adoptive parents.
I am an adoptive mother who cannot imagine life without my beloved children who are biologically related to someone else. When I began the research for my novel, DEBUT, I was only mildly surprised to learn that perhaps a third of United States population is in some way related to a child given up for adoption. But, you can easily calculate the math to see why this figure looms large, for it includes all biological relations from the birth family; the adoptive family of parents, siblings, grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins. And this figure doesn't include friends.
The art of fiction is a perfect medium for portraying the wide spectrum of the adoption triad. DEBUT includes a range of issues that reveal the significance of heritage. The characters hold secrets that are too painful to share even with those they love and so they live on with a broken link to their heritage. Accepting the reality of their lives is a difficult journey because it is traveled alone.
DEBUT speaks for the birth mother who lives with regret and guilt while trying to build a new life; the adopted child who yearns for wholeness while harboring resentment and confusing thoughts, even wondering whose pain is worse - hers or her birth mother's; the adoptive parents who fear their beloved child may one day open the door to the past.
These characters have secrets other people do not have. The birth mother starts building a secret life from the moment she regrets giving up her child and feels grief and guilt. As time goes on, she fears that the child might even reject her for the decision she made and, as a result, cannot face searching for her.
The adoptive parents start building a secret life when they wonder in fear if the birth mother might someday show up at their door. Later on they fear that their child might open the door to the past and upset the balance of their lives.
The adopted child builds a secret life in adolescence, when her inherited vocal gift causes her to wonder about her heritage. Time goes on. What she wants to know most of all is whether her birth mother even once wanted her back.
Please share your comments.
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1 comments:
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